White Glossy Mug
Show your Zuck University pride with this ceramic mug featuring the official university seal. Dishwasher and microwave safe. Available in 11oz, 15oz, and 20oz.
Zuck University Hoodie
The official Zuck University unisex hoodie featuring the classic collegiate seal. Heavyweight cotton blend — warm, soft, and built for serious school spirit.
Zuck University Hoodie Size Guide
| Size label | Length | Width |
|---|---|---|
|
S
|
27
|
20
|
|
M
|
28
|
21
|
|
L
|
29
|
23
|
|
XL
|
30
|
25
|
|
2XL
|
31
|
26
|
|
3XL
|
32
|
28
|
Embroidered Cap / "Dad's Hat"
Show your Dad (or friend, or stranger) how much you appreciate the money they DIDN'T spend on sending you to an imaginary University, like Zuck, with this amazing cap, available in many colors.
Embroidered Cap / "Dad's Hat" Size Guide
| Size label | A | B | C | D |
|---|---|---|---|---|
|
One size
|
23.62
|
4.72
|
2.76
|
7.48
|
Embroidered "Dad's Hat" / Cap
Show your Dad (or friend, or stranger) how much you appreciate the money they DIDN'T spend on sending you to an imaginary University, like Zuck, with this amazing cap, available in many colors.
Embroidered Cap / "Dad's Hat" Size Guide
| Size label | A | B | C | D |
|---|---|---|---|---|
|
One size
|
23.62
|
4.72
|
2.76
|
7.48
|
Zuck University Sticker
Show your Zuck U. spirit with the official Zuck University seal sticker available in 3 sizes (sure to fit any occasion). They're cheap - buy many!
IMPORTANT NOTICE — PLEASE READ WHILE NODDING SOLEMNLY
A Note on Nomenclature. “Zuck,” as employed throughout this brochure, is used strictly in its documented colloquial sense — a dialectal Ohio Valley term meaning roughly “hard luck,” “a raw deal,” or “to be comprehensively cheated by circumstance.” It does not refer to, imply, wink at, high-five, or otherwise associate itself with any person, living or dead, any institute, living or dead, or anything else, living or dead. Any resemblance to anything or anyone in the known universe is unintended, unendorsed, and — should any lawyers be reading — extremely coincidental.A Note on Reality. Zuck University is not an accredited institution. It does not grant degrees, accept tuition, or maintain a bursar's office, because it does not exist. Nothing here constitutes an offer of enrollment or financial aid in any jurisdiction. |
